OKAY.  It's been way long since I've posted a blog.  Not sure why.  It's not that I haven't been busy, it's not that I haven't done a ton of stupid shit, it's not that I haven’t had several hundred hours of couch time… so why is it???   No really?  You have to tell me because I have no clue.

 

This will be my 3rd summer now of blogging and I know you all are sick of my whining about how I hate heat.  BUT…. I HATE HEAT!!


 


 

At least in the fall, winter and spring I can go into my closet room ( yep… that's what it's called.)  A closet room.  We turned a bedroom in our house into a walk in closet.  And not because of my stuff.  (My purse closet is a whole other blog story🧐).  It's because of my husband's clothes.  I swear he has every shirt he has ever owned AND they are all on hangers.  Why wouldn't a person hang a gray t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and holes starting around the chest (okay nipple) area?  And hang it next to the other gray (a different shade) t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and picture of a monkey's butt on the back.  Which is next to the off white t-shirt (used to be white I believe) that was a giveaway from a seed company you worked at in high school.  Must I continue?  You get the drift.

 

AND then socks!!  Do other men have "winter socks" and "summer socks"??  And do they go buy new ones instead of washing the ones they have so they " can have a full load of socks to wash and save time " ?  Hmmmm…  No?   It can't just be mine.  If so, I am definitely the luckiest woman as many have mentioned  frequently over the years.

 

Rant Over. 

 

Back to the closet room and seasons.  I have no problem in 3 of our seasons (mentioned above) going and finding something to wear.  Throw on something and head out.  The summer time is a whole new ballgame.  It's hot so first I need to get the fan out, lift the girls and dry them underneath so I can find a bra that can be worn with a summer shirt.  Then I must find a summer shirt that doesn't show every bump, lump and extra back boob.  This is above and beyond having to make sure my legs are shaved (not to mention struggling to hold up the muffin top to see those legs while shaving) so you can put on something that will hopefully accent the dimples in my knees and thighs.   And on a good day, put those spanx on so when you are in public you look like stuffed sausage after a deer hunting weekend.  Good Times Good Times.

 

After all these years together, my husband just sits on his chair playing Words with Friends and let's me do what I have too.  I know he can hear me cussing, crying, sweating and stomping but he has become immune to it.  He will generally  wait for me to redo my make up for the 4th time and meet me in the garage.  He knows me so well that this spring when I had to be put under for a procedure and I told him to buy me something pretty while shopping, he bought me a Dewalt fan.     WITH the battery packs.  Not going to lie.  As much as I like glitter and glam, the fan has been my favorite gift this year.

 


This weekend we are invited to the lake with some friends.  It is going to be HOT AND HUMID!  But I will guarantee under my swimsuit will be a sweaty pair of spanx holding in the muffin top.   You don't need to do that under a sweatshirt in 50 degree weather.   Just saying!!!

 



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